Did anyone else experience such an emotional experience with A Portrait of the Artist as a Young Man? While I think most of us can agree this semi-autobiographical story was a gripping coming of age story, the religious convictions experienced by Stephen was something that spoke volumes for me. What I enjoyed most about this book is an element we discussed in our first week of blogs (well in my blog anyway)- the ability of a story to change with each read. Also, the vast amount of teen agnst that can be related to- sexual discomfort, first love, growing up too soon or not soon enough, parental disconnect makes it a novel for any era. I'm not too old to forget the confusion and fustrations of young adulthood and something about Young Artist feels very personal to me.Stephen Dedalus is isolated, angry, bitter, confused,torturted. We start Portrait when he is a child, but because he is the oldest of 10 or so children almost immediately there is an unspoken expectation that he grow up faster. His father and uncle include him in grown-up conversation, and grown-up activity as while it's language Stephen doesn't understand, he knows that someday it's going to be significant. In the second chapter we're told of such an occasion, "Trudging along the road or standing in some grimy wayside public house his elders spoke constantly of the subjects nerer their hearts, of Irish politics, of Munster and of the legends of their own family, to all of which Stephen lent an avid ear. Words which he did not understand he said over and over to himself til he had learnt them by heart and through them he had glimpses of the real world about him. The hour when he too would take part in the life of that world seemed drawing near and in secret he began to make ready for the great part which he felt awaited him the nature of which he only dimly apprehended" (42-43).
The last sentence especially (the last hour...) really touched at that cusp between child and young adult. We can't wait to grow up! Make our own decisions, have our own opinions and ability to voice those opinions, but we neverly really know when that moment is. At what point are we children? And at what point have we embraced adulthood? Is there something, some right of passage that needs to take place?
Part of the growing and maturing process is as children we can't wait to grow up, but then as adults we long for the carefree joys of childhood, forgetting all together that childhood is scary and confusing with it's own set of unexplained game rules. What I mean by that is as children we're taught right from wrong, societal expectations, morals and values of our family. We never fully know why something is right or wrong, just that it is. We don't know who makes the rules or why there are even rules, just "because". Stephen's religious convictions towards the end of the novel are a perfect example of that. While he has stopped believing in his parent's religion, he is still the first one to defend it, because deep down there is still some kind of conviction. He had to come full circle with it on his own, experiencing extreme faith and ritualism to a complete loss of faith. Even after reaching his own conclusions he still had that "because" attitude, as we see in the dialogue between Stephen and Cranly on pages 174-181. I can't quote that many pages on here but the few lines that stuck out to me were-
"Do you believe in the eucharist?"
"I do not."
"Do you disbelieve then?"
"I nether believe in it nor disbelieve in it."
"It is a curious thing, do you know how your mind is supersaturated with the religion in which you say you disbelieve. Did you believe in it when you were at school? I bet you did."
"I did."
"And were you happier then? Happier than you are now, for intance?"
"I mean that I was not myself as I am now, as I had to become."
and here
"Did the idea ever occur to you that Jesus was not what he pretended to be?... I mean, did the idea ever occur to you that was himself a conscious hypocrite, what he called the jews of his time, a white sepulchre? Or, to put it more plainly, that he was a blackguard?"
"The idea never occured to me, but I am curious to know are you trying to make a convert out of me or a pervert of yourself?"
"And why were you shocked if you feel sure that our religion is flase and that Jesus was not the son of God?"
"I'm not at all sure of it. He is more like a son of God than a son of Mary."... "I fear more than the chemical action which would be set up in my soul by a flase homage to a symbol behind which are massed twenty centuries of authority and veneration."
Ultimately Stephen experiences a moment when his soul is free and for once feels at peace with himself. While he took an unpopular road by renoucning his faith, the despair, isolation, and disconnect between body and soul slowly melts away. He doesn't have all the answers, but is finally starting to be comfortable in his own skin.
Drea,
ReplyDeleteI love reading your perspective of A Portrait of the Artist as a Young Man. You considered many things I overlooked. For example the part about growing up and the maturing process. You said,
“Part of the growing and maturing process is as children we can't wait to grow up, but then as adults we long for the carefree joys of childhood, forgetting all together that childhood is scary and confusing with it's own set of unexplained game rules.”
I think it is so great that you drew upon this feature of the novel. You’re absolutely right, throughout the novel we see Stephen struggle with his feelings about religion. He begins to turn away from his parents beliefs and views them as ignorant as he beings to develop his own. Although, I don’t always necessarily agree with my parents views on politics/religion but because I love and respect everything they have done for me, I respect their views and can even picture where they are coming from. Maybe it’s a little selfish of Stephen to initially leave his family behind to explore his own “artistic” views. As Stephen enters university we can see how the various types of people and being introduced to new perspectives and ideas affects his own views and is new take on things. Later in the book we begin to see Stephen’s struggle with faith. I found this particular part of the novel really interesting. I think it is safe to say that we have all gone through stages of our life where we have struggled and even challenged what we believe in. I think it’s sad that Stephen wanted to be free from his family. I know he struggled with the poverty they faced and his own ups and downs with what he wanted to believe in. I’m a little bit confused as to what Stephen concludes about breaking free and solitude? Haven’t quite got to the end of the book yet…but by reading your blog I assume you have? So he prefers solitude and doesn’t feel sad for breaking away from his family? I’m not sure I can agree with his choices…
Yes, I definitely felt an emotional experience while reading this story. I felt a connection with this story because I could relate to some of the struggles and obstacles that Stephen dealt with growing up. I like how you mentioned that no one is too old to forget the experience of young adulthood and coming into one’s own. As for me, I just turned 19 yesterday and though most people my age can’t wait to turn 21, I silently wish that I was 15 again. Yes there were struggles I had to go through and I was still under my parents’ watchful eyes but that was the age where I started growing up. I think that the age where you spend your growing up is the most memorable and cherished by people (at least the people I know.) That is the age where you learn the most about yourself and it’s exciting. Like one of my favorite songs quote, “Being grown up isn’t half as fun as growing up..” It seems in this story that Stephen was kind of ‘jipped’ of a good growing up experience. In the end he finally realizes what he wants to do with his life and he reaches the final stage of growing up. At least, that’s how I see it. I also liked when you said, “At what point are we children? And at what point have we embraced adulthood? Is there something, some right of passage that needs to take place?”
ReplyDeleteI thought that this is a good question and I tried answering it above but that’s only through my experience. I believe it’s different for everybody. It was obviously different for Stephen.
Hey Drea,
ReplyDeleteI’m glad to see that you had such an emotional experience from reading the novel, although I am not very surprised by this fact considering it is a story of a young mans journey to discover who he really is, questioning the beliefs and values that he was raised to believe and finding his own path in life. I think that being not only a semi-autobiographical novel, but also a novel that was written for the most part through Stephen’s stream of consciousness made this novel very relatable. Being an account of a young man in the pursuit of self-discovery and all the uncertainties he experiences in that quest is one that most people can relate to, not to mention the fact that you were actually reading about this mans experience from literally within his mind, revealing his feelings of confusion, anger, bitterness, lust, and devotion, making the novel that the more relatable.
While reading one of your comments I came across this statement made by Lucy stating “Maybe it’s a little selfish of Stephen to initially leave his family behind to explore his own “artistic” views.” While I find her opinion very interesting I also completely disagree. I truly believe that Stephens decision to in a sense ‘abandon’ his families beliefs and values in search of his own was not done out of disrespect for his family, but in a quest for self discovery. Being surrounded by such strict beliefs about politics and religion from a young age, which not even his family could agree on made him feel trapped and alone. Breaking free of his family and the religious beliefs instilled in him from a young age in search of his own happiness is an action that I think does not make him selfish, but incredibly brave.
Well Lucky, Happy Birthday! :) I would have to agree with Fay that Stephen's actions were not selfish at all- that's not even an angle I discussed or considered. What was most relatable to me is that even when your belief system has changed there is still that allegiance to it- for Stephen is was defending Jesus. That's exactly how my relgious upbringing us. I never once doubted or questioned the religion my family practiced, and now that I'm older and whatnot I still believe the core of what I was taught even if I don't practice. Our whole lives we're taught the sky is blue, but what if it's actually neon yellow. There are some things you just accept as fact and never question why.
ReplyDeleteVery interesting topic on which to focus: the process of transformation between childhood and adulthood. As your essay successfully (I think) argues, this is very much a pivotal idea in "A Portrait of the Artist as a Young Man." Stephen's journey is certainly influenced by the drastic changes his young mind is experiencing through adolescence.
ReplyDeleteYou touched on the idea that, as children, we are simply told how to act, behave, and what to believe. Stephen embodies this aspect of cultural indoctrination of our youth through his thoroughly-cultivated yet not entirely meaningful or convincing understanding of Catholicism. As a child, he accepts these teachings as they are, allowing him to indulge in skewed relationships and perspectives; particularly regarding his sweetheart, Emma.
In revolting against these teachings, during his period of debauchery, he still is very much influenced and controlled by ideas handed down to him -- he still has yet to fully "grow up" and live his life based on his inner truth.
It is only when Stephen is willing to look objectively at the paradigms which up to then had guided his life that he truly transforms into a genuine young adult; he is willing to honestly investigate, question, and live peacefully with the answers other people have given him regarding life's questions ... ultimately he becomes a man when he is willing to try to answer these questions himself.
The end. Thank you!
Drea,
ReplyDeleteYou have a very popular blog this week. It was very well written and thoughtful. I too have had a deep connection with this book, as you've probably guessed from my blog. I haven't finished the book quite yet, but as you pointed out in discussing his renouncing his parent's faith and beliefs to find himself, this is an important aspect of the book.
"Even after reaching his own conclusions he still had that "because" attitude, as we see in the dialogue between Stephen and Cranly on pages 174-181. I can't quote that many pages on here but the few lines that stuck out to me were-
"Do you believe in the eucharist?"
"I do not."
"Do you disbelieve then?"
"I nether believe in it nor disbelieve in it."
"It is a curious thing, do you know how your mind is supersaturated with the religion in which you say you disbelieve. Did you believe in it when you were at school? I bet you did."
"I did."
"And were you happier then? Happier than you are now, for instance?"
"I mean that I was not myself as I am now, as I had to become."
This is such an excellent point and honestly, I think, so extremely common most people's journeys to self-discovery. Or perhaps just more common in that of the "recovering Catholics" as I call it. I personally have Christian beliefs which are frequently centered on the Catholic religion, yet I have several issues and grievances with the religion as a whole and continue to ask questions. I think this and your personal experiences are what lead you to become the person you truly are. It's what shapes and molds you, but having it "forced" on you makes you push away. Interesting book and interesting posts. Thanks
Tullamore,
ReplyDeleteI'm glad you brought forth this passage for discussion:
Words which he did not understand he said over and over to himself til he had learnt them by heart and through them he had glimpses of the real world about him. The hour when he too would take part in the life of that world seemed drawing near and in secret he began to make ready for the great part which he felt awaited him the nature of which he only dimly apprehended" (42-43).
It seems to me that the initiation into adulthood is really connected to an initiation into the world of language or the world of ideas, not necessarily the "thing," itself. It's interesting to me that Stephen doesn't "see" the real world until he learns words, which are essentially "symbols"--stand-ins for the actual thing (i.e. a cat is NOT the letters c-a-t). Jacques Lacan calls this world of language the "symbolic." I found this discussion of the symbolic off the internet:
The Symbolic: in contrast to the imaginary, the symbolic involves the formation of signifiers and language and is considered to be the "determining order of the subject" (Miller, 279). Seeing the entire system of the unconscious/conscious as manifesting in an endless web of signifiers/ieds and associations, Lacan claims that, "Symbols in fact envelop the life of man in a network so total that they join together, before he comes into the world, those who are going to engender him…" (Language, 42). And, "Man speaks therefore, but it is because the symbol has made him man" (39). The Symbolic Order functions as the way in which the subject is organized and, to a certain extent, how the psyche becomes accessible. It is associated with language, with words, with writing and can be aligned with Peirce’s "symbol" and Saussure’s "signifier." (see symbol-icon-index)
You can read the whole article here:
http://csmt.uchicago.edu/glossary2004/symbolicrealimaginary.htm
I wonder if the "epiphany" Joyce has with the bird girl is actually a "break through" out of the symbolic. Because we think in language, and language is socially constructed, we cannot help but be a product of our social environment. Perhaps Joyce is suggesting in his novel that the only way in which we can become "true" individuals is to "step out" of language and experience the visceral world. This can only happen in a flash (no one can live in the world and live outside of language! We HAVE to communicate somehow!), but we do have moments, flashes, of epiphanies that can completely alter our world view.